TAMAQUA — Borough resident J. Carl Hafer Sr. said the love he has for his wife of 75 years has never wavered.
“We’re still kids,” the 93-year-old said of he and his wife, Jean, 91, on Saturday.
They were married Aug. 15 1941, after running away because his parents did not approve of the marriage though hers did. He was 18 and she was 16 years old. Both are originally from Tamaqua.
“I think this marriage was made in heaven. That is why it lasted so long,” he said.
Jean said he never forgets her birthday or their anniversary and, while he isn’t one to buy flowers and cards for those special occasions, his presence is enough for her. She loves “everything” about him.
“There’s no gifts we can buy for each other except our love,” Carl said.
The couple’s three children, Greg Hafer, Ted Hafer and Ester Borascius, and other family members attended a lunch for them Sunday at La Dolce Casa, Tamaqua.
The children said their parents are an example to them and others of dedication and devotion to one another.
“They never were going to give up no matter what they faced,” Greg Hafer, Tamaqua, said.
Like other parents, he said they had disagreements but never in front of the them. Greg, Ted and Ester talked about their parents recently and what they mean to them.
Greg is the youngest, and he most remembers vacations with his parents and the way his dad respectfully treats his mother.
“He was always good to Mom,” he said.
When they use to go on walks, his dad would walk on the outside near the road as a way to protect her if something happened.
“Those type of old-school manners was my dad,” he said.
His dad wasn’t one to wear his emotions on his sleeve, but his children and wife knew how he felt.
“We always knew he loved us. You can feel the love that he’s had for his family,” he said.
His dad still holds his mother’s hand when they go out, something they don’t do much anymore because he does not drive. Carl gave that up because of his age.
Greg’s mom loved to knit and sew, something she doesn’t do much anymore. She even made mittens for children she didn’t know for Christmas and dolls for the grandchildren.
Carl and Jean have nine grandchildren, 11 great-grandchildren and six great-great-grandchildren.
His mother has always been a constant, loving force in his life, Greg said.
“We never felt that we were in want of anything,” he said.
All three children said they make an effort to call or visit their parents on a regular basis. They believe the strong faith of their parents contributed to the longevity of their marriage. They also participated in a lot of activities together.
Ester also remembers family vacations. She said her father always gave her mother a kiss when he came home from work. To this day, he still compliments Jean. She said her mother is a wonderful baker, lauding her “fantastic” chocolate cake. Easter said the time spent together as a family is important.
“That’s the best gift ever when we are all together,” Ester said.
Ted, 70, of Lake Wynonah, said his parents are great. He said his parents showed him “if you work together you can work things out. You have to learn to listen to the other person.”
Carl said there were times that tested their marriage.
“We did go through a lot in our marriage. She never gave up,” he said.
He was injured while working with the Reading Railroad on a track a long time ago. He said an engine hit him and he rolled under it while it passed over him. He was in the hospital for months.
“I always say guardian angels were with me,” he said.
Carl also was in the Navy as a seaman first class, specialist T, and was an instrument flight instructor. He was stationed in Rhode Island and other locations.
He described his wife as “very caring and loving. She worries too much about me. All she keeps telling me is watch I don’t fall.”
He isn’t afraid to tell his wife he loves her.
“We tell each other we love each other every chance we get,” he said.
His advice for a happy marriage is this: “Always be faithful to your wife and tell her you love her and don’t be afraid to hold her hand.”
The children said their parents’ love is admirable.
“You don’t see a lot of long marriages anymore,” Ted said.